Golden rule

“If you want a golden rule that will fit everything, this is it : Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful”

Though this quote is meant for the house, or rather your home, I find this really appropriate for one’s mind too.

Ever since the consumerism has hit Indians with a resounding thump that promises to transform their world forever, their homes are cluttered. Gone are the comfortable, open spaces and the empty, neat and tidy closets. Now you open a cabinet and clothes tumble out. Clothes that are bought here, there and everywhere. Clothes that are of no real use, but are mostly impulsive buys at one mindless moment of greed. Clothes that don’t really fit you well, that are too tight, or too loose, or too age-inappropriate or maybe profession-inappropriate. Clothes given by this one, and that one, on your birthday, anniversary or just like that. Clothes that you would rather burn, if given a choice.

Go ahead, be brave and open that cabinet. Yes, that one where you throw anything that is small and packaged, and that can’t be classified as something you can wear. Cosmetics, creams, lipsticks, aftershaves, shaving gels, all drop on your head. You bought this one three years back, remember ? And that one just yesterday. But you find yourself wondering what to do with either of them now. Why did you give in to that 40 % off or that Buy one Get one crap ? Why ?

So how about taking a trip today ? Not literally. We’re staying right here – but how about having an out-of-body experience ? Walk out of your life, out of your thoughts, out of your comfort zone. Watch yourself from afar, like an observer.

Just watch your thoughts – you will be surprised by the number of thoughts that clutter your mind, just like useless things clutter your home. Just mark your actions. Make notes. And prepared to be surprised. Very surprised.

Go ahead. Catch yourself attending a phone call from someone you would rather not. You press the answer button, and hate yourself for doing it. But you do. You waste your time, but the most important point is, you waste yourself.

Now you are replying to mindless messages on your phone that are full of gyan on friendship on the ‘Friendship Day’, to ‘friends’ that you haven’t seen in maybe years, and probably have no plans to see ever. There goes an hour.

Now you are thinking about a past friendship that has seen better days. There go your ten minutes, remembering details, wondering about its future when you know there is none.

Here you are, attending a party where you don’t really care for anyone. You are standing there, feeling more alone than ever, hating everything, feeling lost. Why are you here ? Why not at another place, another time ? A place where you feel worthy, maybe. Why did you succumb to this ?

Now you are remembering a particularly unpleasant incident in your life – yes it happened just last year. Yes, it had implications – yes, you like to think about it. Your thoughts hover around it, once every while. And now you have chosen to focus on it, yet again, with no fixed purpose in your mind, just because it has become a habit to look back at it once every while. Hello ! What’s the point ?

None of the above is either useful or beautiful. None of the above has the power to transform your life in any way. None of the above gives your mind the much needed dose of positivity. It’s not beautiful. It’s not useful. It is not required.

Go ahead. Delete. Cut it now. Now.

Clear out your home, throw out anything that you haven't used for the past six months or would not like to use again. Don’t worry about the money you spent. No money spent is worth your peace of mind. Take it out of your space – give it away to someone who needs it. If you can’t find a needy person in your vicinity, then just pack it in one large bag and leave it in the communal garbage bin. I have seen so many little children with large, white garbage bags foraging there. Just looking at them breaks my heart – they are not out there, begging. They are working hard. There will find that booty useful.

And you go back to your empty, breezy home. Open the windows and let the fresh air in. Breathe in deeply.

Do the same to your mind. Your mind needs to breathe too. Declutter it. Today.

And make a promise - to be true to yourself. To never succumb to false promises. To never devalue yourself. To never search for your own worth in someone else's eyes, or thoughts or words. To love yourself, for being yourself.