How many times have I caught myself thinking ‘Why has THIS happened ? THIS should NOT have happened ! And why NOW of all the times ?’ or ‘Why did THAT not happen ? THAT should HAVE happened, and especially, now !’
Many, many times.
And the normal reaction to these thoughts is distress, a feeling of helplessness, a sudden dull impact that translates into a feeling of being a victim of circumstances.
Actually all that I am at that point is out of sync with the rhythm of the universe.
I move along with the rhythm of universe and then once a while, I break the connection with it, step out and question the general order of events. That is when I feel like a complete loser.
Somewhere I had read, and I have never forgotten, that losing and winning, happiness and sadness are nothing but the spawns of our ego. The anti-ego is the soul. The soul recognizes no emotion. It is blissfully unaware of the ego. It is totally in synchronization with the universe and is resonating with its rhythm. The destiny unfolds itself as a result.
The soul has to grow, it has to reach its final destination and it will make us climb mountains, swim through deep seas, walk over hot coals just to reach there. It has no other goal but to reach that destination. The ‘where’ is important. The ’how’ does not matter. No wonder then that we are able to unravel the mysteries of our life only once we have come far and then are able to join the dots.
So why, o why do I break my connection with the universe mid-way and ask inane questions ? I know where I am going and I also know that it will be a very hard journey. It will take every ounce of the patience I possess, it will suck me dry of all the tears I have… but I will reach there one day.
And then I will stand there on the peak of the mountain, with the cool breeze in my hair, my fingers around the flag I have unfurled on the rich soil of my destiny while the whispers of the universe will echo around me “Why did you ever doubt me ?”
And at that moment, I will know all the answers. And I will smile back at the cosmos.
Beautiful Sujata!!! Nice to know this side of you.. now the question is WHEN WILL YOU GET HERE ?!?!!!??
ReplyDeleteAnurag,
ReplyDeleteThank you. And to answer the million dollar question... no answer at all !! But hopefully, one day I will. And I will announce it right here, in this blog. :)
Anurag, that will be nice actually :)
ReplyDeleteNow I have to check ur blog everyday!!!
ReplyDeleteThe ‘where’ is important. The ’how’ does not matter. Mere dil ki baat keh di, very good Sujata, continue writing.
ReplyDelete@Suju bachche: Apun pehle bhi bola tere ko aur phir bolta hae : Yeh protein - shroteins chhodne ka....khaali blog - shlog likhne ka! Blog likhenga toh tu akkha world mein famous ho jayenga. Abbi bolta hae baat maan le apun ka!
ReplyDeleteSubhash, Yes, the ends justify the means. Thanks so much. :)
ReplyDeleteGraci, kya karen. Proteins se rozi-roti chalti hai. Blog se kuch nahin milne ka. But I know what you mean.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your constant encouragement :)
Lovely post Ma'am!!
ReplyDeleteevery crisis is an oppurtunity nd so we shud not loose midway!!!
u hav narrated this very fact so nicely!!
"the peak of the mountain" is a beauty to look at, painful to reach bt the view frm the top is of majestic beauty!!!
Regards
Swagata
Swagata, now thats the way to go !
ReplyDeleteAm so happy to see you back in your old fighter spirit !
Keep smiling, and take care. Longing to meet you again !