You waited

The Lake House… made me realize something.

In the past few years I was wondering where things are going wrong. Not wrong exactly… but kind of unfulfilling. Everything looks so simple, so approachable, so cushy. Then what was missing ?

What was missing was that everything, just everything is right here, right now.

Over the past years, the world around me has gone through a major change. Friends just a mobile phone call away, the whole world that used to live in your memories now living on facebook, malls all over the place, offering just everything one’s heart could desire, everything affordable, everything easy. Just name it, you get it. So now we are living in a world where there are no distances, nothing out of reach.

The idea is ‘You want it, you get it.’ Happiness, excitement, stimulation, thrills – all possible ! Why wait ? Everyone wants everything just now. Just reach out for whatever your heart desires, and grab it.

So now I find myself asking myself ‘What is not possible ?’ Because now it seems that my consciousness has realized that maybe NOT reaching out for that elusive object would do more wonders than actually reaching out. Everything is objectified, love, relationships, work, even peace of mind. Everything has been organized into neat little cubicles and labelled.

And the constant litany to ‘’enjoy, enjoy, enjoy’’ ! I am sick of being forced to enjoy life, responsibilities, work, holidays.. Why don’t I just live life without something, like public opinion or peer pressure or a sense of self worth dictating every moment of it ? Why am I trying to force myself to be ‘’happy’’ when being poignant would make me feel more fulfilled ?

I am sick of consumerism. I am tired of it. I wish to lay back on the green grass in a sunny patch, and just let life pass me by. No aggression, no drive. Just receive whatever is coming my way, and letting go of whatever that is not.

Last week I watched a beautiful movie ‘’Lake House’’ and I just let the slow pace of this marvellous fantasy movie get absorbed into my consciousness, into my psyche.

The second-last line of this movie “It’s taken me all this time to say it, but I love you. If you still care for me, don’t look for me. Wait for me, wait with me, just wait.”

And the last line…‘You waited’.

The last line took my breath away. This movie celebrates patience unabashedly. It lets time wash over every desire, every need and every longing. Yes, there is longing… but the longing is allowed to find roots and to flourish.

I wish to wait too… and to never seek what I am waiting for. I have celebrated my longing by merely wishing. It does not have to become a reality. It exists.. somewhere.. in time. Maybe in my past, maybe in my future, maybe in my dreams. That’s enough. That’s enough.

Yes, I am waiting. And that’s all I am doing for now.

I wish for something or someone to say ''You waited'.."